Tag Archives: mental health

Strong Suffering

(Poem 16 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

“When we insulate ourselves from the possibility of harm, we also deprive ourselves of the beauty that our brokenness can display.” -Jay Wolf in Suffer Strong

Strong suffering
bears little resemblance
to gritting of teeth,
white-knuckled grip,
muffled cries to spare
sensibilities ill-suited to pain.

No, strong suffering
is the unfurling of a
closed heart to her lover,
a ripening of self,
splitting apart of shell
to reveal the vulnerable
underbelly of fear.

Strong suffering
does not batten
down the hatches and
bolt the doors
against all possible
atrocities, real or imagined.

No, she flings open
the shutters to welcome
the wind and invites
the intruders to break
bread at her table,
her only intention
to pay attention.

@Home Studio after finishing the book Suffer Strong by Katherine and Jay Wolf – 16th poem of the year

Wolf, Katherine and Jay, Suffer Strong – How to Survive Anything by
  Redefining Everything, Zondervan, Michigan, 2020.

Sor Juana of the Spanish Golden Age

(Poem 15 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

AI Generated image I prompted on Gencraft.com https://gencraft.ai/p/GVmKE6

Sor Juana of the Spanish Golden Age
refused to see through rose-colored glasses.
She says she preferred, with words on the page,
a different view from all the masses.

With both of her eyes in both of her hands,
she would rather her vision be by touch,
than live life lost in nonsensical lands
created by imagination’s crutch.

But optimism was filtered through green
instead of rose when that great lady lived.
The color of aloe, basil, and trees;

nature’s youth, death’s only alternative.
Her sight was such that she must have foreseen
more colors than anyone could forgive.

@ Home Studio after reading “Sonnet 152” by Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz translated by Edith Grossman -15th poem of the year.

Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz – Selected Works. Translated by Edith
  Grossman, W.W. Norton and Company, New York, 2014,
  pp. 64.

Runner ups for the AI Sor Juana blind rose-colored glasses photos to accompany my poem:

And a few more because they turned out so pretty:

Sor Juana was a feminist nun intellect writer (etc.) who lived from 1651-1695 and is often called the 10th Muse of Mexico. I am reading a book of her writings currently that has been translated into English. I was struck by “Sonnet 152” and the imagery used in her time of green hues rather than rose-colored glasses as the tint of false optimism we recognize currently. I happen to like my glasses quite rose-colored, thank you very much, but I get what she’s saying, especially since she lived in a time when women were much more oppressed. Her criticism of misogyny led to her censure by the church and confiscation of her possessions including over 4,000 books, musical instruments, scientific equipment, etc. She died a year later of the plague.

Life is a Carnival

(Poem 14 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

“Oh, there’s no need to cry because life is a carnival, and it’s more beautiful to live singing.” -Celia Cruz “Life is a Carnival”

“Ay, no hay que llorar que la vida es un carnaval, y es más bello vivir cantando.” -Celia Cruz “La Vida Es Un Carnaval”

“Ay, no hay que llorar…”
Tears don’t heal a scar.
Instead, accept la paz
granted only by loss
to those hit by the rule
“Que la vida es cruel.”

You see, it’s a lie,
this compunction to cry,
for it says we’re alone,
pero “nunca estará solo.”
Dios está contigo.
God is where we go.

And when we hate
or raise complaint,
sin, pollute, make war,
“Ay, no hay que llorar…”
Rather, sing one and all
“que la vida es un carnaval.”

(@ Home Studio after watching the Spanish musical La Usurpadora: The Musical with Celinda and Debbie, which featured Celia Cruz’s song as the opening number. I have many happy Salsa memories dancing to this song – 14th poem of the year.)

Translation Spanish to English (It will not rhyme in the translation):

“Oh, there’s no need to cry…”
Tears don’t heal a scar.
Instead, accept the peace
granted only by loss
to those hit by the rule
“that life is cruel.”

You see, it’s a lie,
this compunction to cry,
for it says we’re alone,
but “we are never alone.”
God is with us.
God is where we go.

And when we hate
or raise complaint,
sin, pollute, make war,
“Oh, there’s no need to cry…”
Rather, sing one and all
“because life is a carnival.”

Cruz, Celia; Daniel, Victor, “La Vida Es Un Carnaval,” Mi Vida Es
  Cantar, 1998.
La Usurpadora: The Musical, Limón; Santiago, Hiojos, María. Walden
  Entertainment, Inc., 2023.

Lesson 1 from The Way of the Wizard

(Poem 13 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

“…every living thing is the entire universe, only wearing a different disguise.” -Merlin, Deepak Chopra’s The Way of the Wizard

AI Generated image I prompted on Gencraft.com
https://gencraft.ai/p/sDIotX

What room for silence
when preferences clamor
for precedence
and feelings battle one
another to reign?

The mind asserts its
dominance by forcing
rejection of other,
delineating you versus me
and they versus we.

How can peace seep
into our spirit crevasses
unless the outside
splits open to release
it from within?

Until we listen to
the inner voice crying
out, “Find me,” 
we will never realize,
“All this is myself.”

@Home Studio – 13th poem of the year

Chopra, Deepak. The Way of the Wizard: Twenty Spiritual Lessons for
  Creating the Life You Want. New York, United States of America,
  Harmony Books, 1995, pp. 19-21.

Runner ups for the AI cosmic oneness photos to accompany my poem:

My Demon

(Poem 9 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

Photo by Rishabh Dharmani on Unsplash

My demon
was once a believer
whose heart was broken
by killing
his love.
Could any soul
survive such cruelty
in the name of
Confucius?
Kong Qui would be
offended by
blood blasphemy.
The teacher who
teaches humanity,
filial piety,
righteousness and ritual
as four pillars
of morality
would never condone
violence as a means
to an end.
Is God a homeless
gambler betting on
peoples’ fates for fun?
No wonder love
turns to hate
and there’s always
hell to pay.

@Home Studio – 9th poem of the year; written while watching (and inspired by) My Demon episode 12 “The Savior of Destruction”, one of my current Korean shows.

The New Year

(Poem 8 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

(AI Generated images I prompted on Gencraft.com)

The new year arrived without
much ado while I slept.
Then the proverbial fan spluttered.
Five hours later, I drove my
husband home from the emergency room
a little doped up, but thankful
for temporary relief from a kidney stone.
Two days later I propped up his ass
so he wouldn’t fall off the porch
after a root canal and more meds
than his delicate constitution
could withstand on a weekday.
We’re only a few days in to 2024,
but it needs to slow its roll,
pace itself, it’s doing too much.

@Home Studio – 8th poem of the year

(Some more images playing around with AI…one of my favorite is this dragon representing 2024 doing WAY TOO MUCH!)

(And this poor little guy in the bottom left about to get eaten by 2024…)

(Here are some more because I was having trouble coming up with an image to represent what I wanted. We’ve got bleak city streets, Dickensonian dental surgery, and the after Christmas blues in this collage.)

I Don’t Know How

(Poem 6 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

AI Generated image I prompted on Gencraft.com https://gencraft.ai/p/DmpRJu

I don’t know how
to write about the real
things that keep me up
at night because
I’ve forgotten what they are.

My mind is as empty as
a lazy metaphor,
my brain smooth silk,
my soul a settled morning pond.

I’m afraid enlightenment
might make me a worse poet.
Do sages fear writer’s block,
Or do they eschew the arts?

Will newfound peace
change my focus such that
my words will suffer?
Have I found the worry stone
to hold in my palm tonight?

Well, looky there, proof
I’m still on the mortal plane,
but I’m getting closer
to the obliteration of self
and who knows what that means…

@Home Studio – 6th poem of the year

Candles Lit

(Poem 5 for 2024 – I am writing a poem a day)

AI Generated image I prompted on Gencraft.com https://gencraft.ai/p/hyBGfL

Candles lit
Cleared space
Tea at the ready
Blank page
Dogs asleep
at my feet
Husband in a
snuggie so
the air can be
comfortable
for the furnace
that is me
Perfect evening
to sit and write
Melt my soul
back to the night
Quiet peace
Edge of dream
Twinkle lights
add softness
Husband’s touch
subtle as a battle cry
but welcome
and enough
Nice to share
a relaxing day
alone together
Our secret foreplay
And when he
switches the laundry
my heart melts
a little bit more
softening edges
I forget are rough,
angry and wounded
in need of love

@Home Studio – 5th poem of the year

Shacks Who Shriek

Shacks who shriek, spiders who skate,
werewolves teach, moons deflate.
Scheming rat and wild dog howl,
soul-sucking beasts, murder most foul.

If what you fear most is simply fear,
the time-turned solution is plain and clear.
Face the truths that make you quake,
be it darkness or heights, failure or snake.

Retrace your steps past trauma and pain –
executioner’s blade, monsters on a train.
Save yourself with the strength you find.
Be your own hero; leave the past behind.

Stand up to the demon who threatens joy,
be it anger, depression, the urge to destroy.
The time-turned solution is plain and clear
if what you fear most is simply fear.

Tonight I watched Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban with friends. The twists and turns are quite complex in this story line, but all converge to elucidate themes of facing fear, unmasking the truth, and fighting for justice for the wrongly accused. It is very well done and inspires poetry for me when I watch it.

Gold-filled Trunks

Dust more valuable than gold,
treasures worth their weight
in memory.
Antique steamer trunks
stacked at the foot of the bed
hold space, time –
capsules layered with matter.

I have been buying trunks on Marketplace to use as storage. I never liked the plastic totes and cardboard boxes I used to keep my items in. These feel full of mystery and history. They even inspire poetry.