My elephant thinks she’s invisible, despite the fact that I speak to her daily and offer to take her wherever she may wish to go.
She prefers to lurk in doorways, eavesdrop on my conversations with prospective employers and watch Korean dramas over my shoulder.
We’ve settled nicely into a routine of keeping each other at trunk’s length and eyeing suspiciously any behaviors indicative of confidence.
She likes it when I nap, over-schedule, talk on the phone, or make pictures of elephants in living rooms with other elephants in paintings and televisions.
I like it when she forgets her vow of silence, tells me what it’s like to take up so much space, to fill the room with herself, and trumpet her name.
Merlin once ran around waving a butcher’s knife like a mad man. Arthur, alarmed, pleaded with him to stop and explain himself. Merlin said he wanted to try thinking the way mortals seem to do, chopping and dissecting, using the mind like a blade.
The violent force of rationality divides, dissociates, isolates, detaches. It is the opposite of awareness which unites, marries, coalesces. The intellectual universe glue is knowingness, not “knowing things”. We see not by sight, but by tapping into the water of life at the source.
The “mind behind the mind” must be the “eye behind the eye” for the seer to stay the same no matter the scenery. Depending on the observer, this poem could be merely ink dots on wood pulp or electronic pixels rendered on a screen, or it could be ideas and information—awareness manifesting itself in “storable form”.
The eye reading this poem is an energy cloud miraculously capable of perceiving images. Yet, that same eye cannot see radio waves, neutrinos, dark matter, love.
“Who saw the eye before the eye saw anything?”
This poem exists because a consciousness wanted to share this code and unfold strands of energy to be revealed to another consciousness, you.
Are you dreaming this poem or is this poem dreaming you?
@Home Studio – 21st poem of the year
Chopra, Deepak. The Way of the Wizard: Twenty Spiritual Lessons for Creating the Life You Want. New York, United States of America, Harmony Books, 1995, pp.29-34.
Runner ups for the AI cosmic oneness dragonfly observer photos to accompany my poem:
If he rejects all your broken parts, he doesn’t deserve any of you. If she can’t accept you scars and all, she doesn’t need the pretty smooth layer. If they want to kick you while you’re down, they don’t get to celebrate your triumph.
If he hopes to bring you guilt and shame, he shouldn’t earn your praise or loyalty. If she turns away from your deepest pain, she doesn’t merit sharing your joy. If their words are meant to bruise and cut, they are not entitled to your heart.
Make no apologies; there is nothing you are not worthy of. You are a glorious, barricade busting, drum major marching, get back up again, not scared to be seen, flood sending, meant to be, proud bringer of this is me.
@Home Studio after attending Alamo Village Drafthouse’s The Greatest Showman sing along with Debbie and Liz – 19th poem of the year
Gracey, Michael. The Greatest Showman. Twentieth Century Fox, 2017.
Runner ups for the AI circus proud and unique photos to accompany my poem:
Arthur could not see his own reflection in the clear water pond and was afraid to confess as much to Merlin. I thought of him today and the lesson he was taught in response to the wonderful news that a lack of self-image is a sign of innocence.
To gaze peacefully out my sliding glass door is an act of creation, for the observer plants the seed of life by noticing, recalling, becoming invested in, and growing to love the deer who stand munching, daring the dogs to bark, antlers high in defiance, the squirrels chittering angrily as they race along the fence top, provoking growls and menace, the birds who nest, the possums who hide, the mice who find their way inside, the skunks who waddle around in the dark, magical beasts who sparkle with newness if only we clean our lenses, witness them afresh, and listen for the faintest of songs sung by them all called, “Behold yourself.”
@Home Studio – 18th poem of the year
Chopra, Deepak. The Way of the Wizard: Twenty Spiritual Lessons for Creating the Life You Want. New York, United States of America, Harmony Books, 1995, pp. 23-28.
Runner ups for the AI cosmic oneness photos to accompany my poem:
“When we insulate ourselves from the possibility of harm, we also deprive ourselves of the beauty that our brokenness can display.” -Jay Wolf in Suffer Strong
Strong suffering bears little resemblance to gritting of teeth, white-knuckled grip, muffled cries to spare sensibilities ill-suited to pain.
No, strong suffering is the unfurling of a closed heart to her lover, a ripening of self, splitting apart of shell to reveal the vulnerable underbelly of fear.
Strong suffering does not batten down the hatches and bolt the doors against all possible atrocities, real or imagined.
No, she flings open the shutters to welcome the wind and invites the intruders to break bread at her table, her only intention to pay attention.
@Home Studio after finishing the book Suffer Strong by Katherine and Jay Wolf – 16th poem of the year
Wolf, Katherine and Jay, Suffer Strong– How to Survive Anything by Redefining Everything, Zondervan, Michigan, 2020.
“Oh, there’s no need to cry because life is a carnival, and it’s more beautiful to live singing.” -Celia Cruz “Life is a Carnival”
“Ay, no hay que llorar que la vida es un carnaval, y es más bello vivir cantando.” -Celia Cruz “La Vida Es Un Carnaval”
“Ay, no hay que llorar…” Tears don’t heal a scar. Instead, accept la paz granted only by loss to those hit by the rule “Que la vida es cruel.”
You see, it’s a lie, this compunction to cry, for it says we’re alone, pero “nunca estará solo.” Dios está contigo. God is where we go.
And when we hate or raise complaint, sin, pollute, make war, “Ay, no hay que llorar…” Rather, sing one and all “que la vida es un carnaval.”
(@ Home Studio after watching the Spanish musical La Usurpadora: The Musical with Celinda and Debbie, which featured Celia Cruz’s song as the opening number. I have many happy Salsa memories dancing to this song – 14th poem of the year.)
Translation Spanish to English (It will not rhyme in the translation):
“Oh, there’s no need to cry…” Tears don’t heal a scar. Instead, accept the peace granted only by loss to those hit by the rule “that life is cruel.”
You see, it’s a lie, this compunction to cry, for it says we’re alone, but “we are never alone.” God is with us. God is where we go.
And when we hate or raise complaint, sin, pollute, make war, “Oh, there’s no need to cry…” Rather, sing one and all “because life is a carnival.”
Cruz, Celia; Daniel, Victor, “La Vida Es Un Carnaval,” Mi Vida Es Cantar, 1998. La Usurpadora: The Musical, Limón; Santiago, Hiojos, María. Walden Entertainment, Inc., 2023.
What room for silence when preferences clamor for precedence and feelings battle one another to reign?
The mind asserts its dominance by forcing rejection of other, delineating you versus me and they versus we.
How can peace seep into our spirit crevasses unless the outside splits open to release it from within?
Until we listen to the inner voice crying out, “Find me,” we will never realize, “All this is myself.”
@Home Studio – 13th poem of the year
Chopra, Deepak. The Way of the Wizard: Twenty Spiritual Lessons for Creating the Life You Want. New York, United States of America, Harmony Books, 1995, pp. 19-21.
Runner ups for the AI cosmic oneness photos to accompany my poem:
The new year arrived without much ado while I slept. Then the proverbial fan spluttered. Five hours later, I drove my husband home from the emergency room a little doped up, but thankful for temporary relief from a kidney stone. Two days later I propped up his ass so he wouldn’t fall off the porch after a root canal and more meds than his delicate constitution could withstand on a weekday. We’re only a few days in to 2024, but it needs to slow its roll, pace itself, it’s doing too much.
@Home Studio – 8th poem of the year
(Some more images playing around with AI…one of my favorite is this dragon representing 2024 doing WAY TOO MUCH!)
(Here are some more because I was having trouble coming up with an image to represent what I wanted. We’ve got bleak city streets, Dickensonian dental surgery, and the after Christmas blues in this collage.)